Barack in Retirement, or is it in Exile?

Chris Vila

Our correspondent, Don Lemon of CNN, caught up with the former President Barack Obama in his first interview since Donald Trump took office.

Don Lemon: What have you been up to these past few weeks, Barack?

Obama: Look around, Don. Just me and a few friends, hanging out on Necker Island…

British Virgin Islands…

You know, Branson’s private island. Oh man, warm and sunny…

Reminds me of my days in Hawaii.

I couldn’t take any more of that “Rancho Mirage Presidential Retreat” place for more than a few days. Been there six times already…

And the weather sucked. California rain? Please…

And folks everywhere.

DL: So what’s the deal here, Barack?

BO: Necker Island? Well, Richard has been a long-time advocate of legal weed.

We met at the White House in 2012 after Dave Cameron came…

Do you remember when Sir Richard joked about asking me for a spliff at that panel discussion? He wasn’t joking. My kind of guy. We just hit it off and I’ve been counting down the days since. When you make it to the top…

That spotlight…

Man, I need that downtime…

Eight friggin’ years…

Serious shit every day…

Hey Don, does it smell like Ferguson?


DL: Hahahaha. Don’t bust my chops…

I thought i was reporting the scene…

Called it as I saw it.


Well, that shit’s got to stop!


… Narc!

Anyways, 2012…

My friend David Maranis wrote that book about my high school years.

I had turned fifty and he reminded me of times…

The Choomwagon, total absorption…

Intercepting joints…

Those were the best years of my life!…

I’m here now, you know what I mean?

DL: And what’s your average day look like?

BO: Well, it’s about “me time…”

I’ve earned it…

Like some midlife crisis…

But better!

I sleep as late as I want…

I’ll read some Borowitz or some GlossyNews. Kick it with one of eight kinds of cereals…

Do you know how hard it is to get BooBerry or Count Chocula?


… My day doesn’t really start until 4:20.


I might shoot hoops with Reggie Love… That’s his real name.


I like my Arugula Salad with jerk chicken. I’ll wash it down with Jamaican Red Stripe Beer and watch the sun go down… Are you feelin’ me?”

DL: Yeah POTUS, the islands… Hey, didn’t Michelle just leave here last week to DC with Sasha?

BO: Michelle went. I got her a sweet huge “rental…”


8,200 square feet in the Kalorama District … I’m having a good time here with Richard… He runs his empire from here…

You know, I can tweet from here, set up my foundation from here…

Don, you know how popular I am, right? So many things I can do…

I’m thinking crazy stuff like writing for Wallace, maybe a regular column…

Or starting a show…

Filmed from right here…

You know it’s gonna work


… Maybe something like “WWOD, What Would Obama Do?”


I really have this Dave Chappelle thing in mind… Me as Nixon… Cheney… Russians …


I’m gonna call it “When They Go Low, I Go High!”

Michelle came up with that… I’m telling you Don, I’m done with politics!

… Hey what time is it? … Don, you got to go!


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In his Lonely Hour, Trump Embraces the Swamp

Posted on April 05, 2017.
Posted by Chris Vila

April arrives, and like seasons, brings cherry blossoms to bloom in Washington D.C.
One side or another deflowers the hopes of Liberty or the Peace  Movement.

Trump has embraced warfare and the welfare state.The swamp will take away the bloom from the wild Irish rose.

When it comes to American political parties, I can barely tell them apart.
Perhaps it’s due to the distance I allow myself from the modern day political orgy.
Maybe it’s because I look at end results…

Bloated federal beasts with a vast military presence in some 150+ countries.  It grew under Nobel Peace Prize winner Obama. President Obama practiced regime change, as did Bush #2, Bill, and Papa Bush.

All woo the poor or the aged with entitlements.

The CIA, the NSA, et. al, all march along a growth path regardless of Administration. And everybody was inside the Neocon, bloodthirsty, corrupt, welfare state power whore they call Hillary.

So how to tell them apart? Democrats and Republicans may seem like big-boned, big-throated Brits belting out ballads for mass consumption. Adele would be the one with big boobs.  Sam Smith the one with small boobs.

Stay with me.

Over time they are predictable, like a free market Marco Rubio. He talks Liberty, but little Marco always gets a big boner when he pushes tough military talk with Russia. That’s what’s inside of him.

By my reckoning, Washington DC all seem like those Russian Matryoshka dolls.

If you didn’t know them well, you might say Sam Smith is Adele. Big and white Anglos with a sense of melodrama.That’s how I see Paul Ryan and the mainstream Republican establishment. Whole Lotta Love inside that group for the end result regarding the shadow long term game plan.

As for Ryan, he has a preference for the insurance lobbyist types. Most Democrats today do dastardly deeds for octogenarian men, specifically named George Soros.

The whole lot of them are like high-end prostitutes.  When the price is met, no Act is beneath them. It helps to not kiss your patron or look in their constituent’s eyes.

When an outsider President comes to town, no one can figure out who is inside him.  It seems like no one is inside Trump, but he is willing to walk both sides of the street to get inside whatever he can. This month he bites his right wing support for pitiful Democrat votes…
Those that label him vile things.

John McCain is determined to finish his life in pursuit of more warfare.  We know McCain is deep inside the life-long bachelor Lindsey Graham, a man surely blackmailed by some alphabet agency somewhere. They are always up for a confrontation with Russia or Assad or Khadaffi, like tigers on vasoline.

And like Rubio,  McCain and Graham prefer taking it from defense companies, if not octogenarians. All the old dudes, carry the news.

Speaker Paul Ryan may have burrowed just far enough into Trump’s inner circle to lead a losing health care battle like some pervert with a gerbil to the sounds of Adele’s Running in the Deep. (“Your gonna wish you had never met me”)

There must be some general wink or secret handshake that puts the Military Industrial Complex in bed with the Welfare State like  a drunk John Boehner gets inside Nancy Pelosi.

When we were young, we thought someone like Ron Paul could change the world. End the empire, bring peace and prosperity.
A humble government responsive to her citizens.

Perhaps Susan Boyle awkwardly gets inside Liberty, where I dream a dream that Rand Paul, using The Trump Admin, stops the madness-the madness of Perpetual War and a Surveillance State that knows no borders nor 4th Amendment.

The madness that has us protect NATO and pay for it.

The NSA madness, where basically the whole world is wiretapped, only to be accessed at a later date. The No-Knock Policies of an increasingly militarized police force and funded by civil asset forfeiture.

And of course, the American bases around the world with American troops now in over 150+ Countries – our drone warfare in several countries without trial nor indeed protection for bystanders under 16 year old US Congressional Authority.

I know I’m not the only one.